EATING INSANITY

By Jean Antonello, RN, BSN, obesity and eating disorders specialist and author of The Great Big Diet Lie, How to Become Naturally Thin^® by Eating More, Breaking Out of Food Jail and Naturally Thin^® Kids, www.naturally-thin.com

Based on the notion that calories, by themselves, (i. e. eating food) makes people fat, here’s a list of terms that would be appropriate for anyone following this type of approach:

Sugar-free
Calorie-free
No-calorie
Low-calorie
Less filling
More filling
Low carb
No carb
High protein
Extra high protein
No-fat
Low-fat
Even less than low-fat
Lower than low-low- fat
The lowest fat possible but not as tasteless as completely fat free
So low-fat that under a microscope you can’t detect a fat cell
Cardboard food—no calories, no fat, no sugar, no taste—won’t do anything for you but it won’t make you gain weight
Exercise morsels—workout substitutes for negative calorie eating

If we take the current trend in food avoidance to its natural conclusion, we should simply put warning labels on all foods that contain any calories whatsoever. This label could read:

CAUTION! This product contains calories that cause weight gain and consequent social discrimination. DO NOT USE this product if you want to be thin enough to be accepted or admired, get a good job or get married to a nice person. Regular use of this product may impair your ability to have any kind of a decent life.

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